A Letter To Koffee...

By: Koffee Black (@koffeeblacklies)

Buy Our Book Here: Cigarettes & Bad Decisions, The S*** I Wish I'd Known
Magazine: Standing Room Only Magazine Issue 6 June 2017
Our Podcast: Cigarettes & Bad Decisions Podcast

Dear Koffee,

     Hello old friend. You may not remember me, it's been awhile since we've seen each other. Too long to be exact. Remember when you started your 1st podcast "The Truth About Lies"? Well I was with you back then around that time... You were in a period of bliss even though everything in your life wasn't the exact way you wanted to be. You had found something that gave you purpose and drive that you hadn't felt since you graduated high school and left your athletic career behind. You went through an extended period of feeling disconnected to the world around you. Right about now you're reading this wondering what the hell is this, who am I and what the fuck is going on! Trust me by the end of this it will all be clear to you.

      Knowing you as well as I do, you're squinting those bright yet intense eyes of yours trying to process this letter and its intent. Do me a favor and go grab that bottle of Johnny Walker Black Label and a glass. No ice though, I know when things get heavy you like your cocktail strong as life smacks you across the face. You Got It?? GOOD!! Now let's get into this. You see Koffee as good as a person as you are and aspire to be, you have some immense flaws in your character that prevent you from living up to your full potential. 

     First off your self-esteem and lack of confidence in who you truly are is more harming to you than any bullet piercing your body. Since the beginning you have always formulated yourself to take on a image to appease others around you believing that to be accepted you needed to do so. This particular mindset along with being such an outgoing individual with people as you are gave u the ability to be able to move throughout different social groups no matter race, gender, religion, economical status etc... and be accepted from all as 1 of their own. Virtually there is no social situation you cant conform too! However, in doing so you meticulously blended and formed a persona that focused on the most important keys within these social tiers. Then you created a mask/shield so impenetrable no one/thing could reach you unless you choose to. And being that your fear of vulnerability is so strong you never did so. When you looked in the mirror you had become this metaphysical avatar. 

    I'm guessing at this point I have peeked your interest and also for a lack of a better phrase FUCKED your head up! Yea I tend to do that from time to time even if people don't like to admit it. Go head and grab that wood tip wine Black & Mild that you depend on so much in high stress situations. You're so predictable sometimes its hilarious. Don't forget to top off that poison sitting next to you. What is it you like to call it, Ahhh yes "The Devils Nectar". Always got a chuckle out of that. 

    Which brings me to your next downfall, your weakness to self-destruct & self-indulge and in things that are simply no good for you to cope with life's ills. Question Koffee, how many times have you been in position to capitalize on a great opportunity in all aspects of life to then have it squandered away do to procrastination & self-indulgence/ self destruction. Most times people look to have a scapegoat to blame there problems on and often they have a legit case... YOU SIR, are not 1 of those people. You have exhibited a lack of self-control at the MOST inconvenient times, its simply aggravating. I mean damn homie you know that saying "If I Had Your Hand I Would Trade Mine In" well thats dead on accurate in terms of you brotha! You became addicted to being the example of what not to do instead of what to do. Now i'll give you this much credit. It wasn't all the time it just seemed to appear when the money was on the line. All-Time collapses in pivotal decision making situations involving relationships, business opportunities and etc... The irony in this however, is the fact when it came to individuals surrounding you, your ability to guide them and lift them up over circumstances that would propel them to their own achievements in life. You got more joy out of seeing them succeed than investing in your own success. 

   O.k Muthafucka, take it easy on the bottle and slow down on the drags off the cigar... Is it sinking in yet? Yeah it is, don't think to hard on it the answer is right in front of you! Look up at the mirror. Take a loooooong good look and a deep breath! That's right you got it! Wondering how this is possible aren't you? Well buddy no need to wonder, as advanced as your foresight is into the many wonders of the world, even you couldn't solve this puzzle. 

    Now that I got your full attention listen up! I need your help as much as you feel you now need mine. I need you to get your shit together. Its time brotha, been time! For what's coming to you to exist, you need to focus and get locked in. What's Coming To You Exactly? Well for starters all your worries are no longer. Things actually workout. Although things don't go quite the way you want them too, they still do workout. Like you said in that book you wrote "There's Always A Way!" Your family life will be as great as you intended and could ever hope for, your kids are blessed beyond measure even though their still young and will make their own mistakes and have to find their path in life. Your Marriage & Queen is why you strive to breathe every morning you wake up. Marriage is the ultimate selfless challenge that you take on with pride everyday. Your friends/family are with you for every step on this incredible ride you're going on. Through the joy, laughter and tears they're in position for life. Your career is above and beyond anything you can phantom!! You are as strong as every trial and tribulation has developed you for. Every test, every fail, every triumph leads to this moment... 

    Koffee understand that for any of this to come into fruition it is by your decision making. By your dedication to strive for greatness. Your "Want Too Effect"... Why not you Koffee? Why Not You? Keep asking yourself these 3 words through your journey and we will meet again! WHY NOT YOU!! So now go head pour up that glass, sit back and take that deep drag and exhale brotha... Envision your greatness from now on and embody the positive perspective. Understand that it is about Progress not Perfection that you will strive and reach your peak! There Is A Thrown Awaiting You, But It Is Up To You To Grasp It. 

Sincerely yours truly Future Koffee Black

Self Evaluation: