When We Becomes Me

Written By: MrJackBrickhouse (@GotMyShades)

Website: mrjackbrickhouse.org brickhousecares.org brickhousepros.com

My Book: Cigarettes & Bad Decisions, The S*** I Wish I'd Known

As an adolescent and into my adulthood, I have witnessed many great teams accomplish many great things leading to some very high accolades. I have also witnessed the majority of those great teams crumble only to become a distant memory of what they used to be. Coming from an outside perspective as many of do, I'm looking at the situation like, "How are you guys not keeping it together when you have captured lightning in a bottle?" It was the craziest thing to me. I remember in the mid to late 90's when Behind The Music on MTV and similar shows documenting the lives of stars whose light had dimmed, gave us an insight to what happens internally when a team who is at the top of their industry, falls from the clouds and actually hits the ground and survives. As I have lived more life since watching those shows in the 90's, I have personally seen the rise and fall of many great teams from inception to departure. I think back to when, in R&B/Hip-Hop, record companies like No Limit Records, Bad Boy Records, and Roca-A-Fella Records were positioned at the top of their industry. The Lakers run in the NBA in the Shaq and Kobe era. I can recall when Tisha Campbell walked away from Martin Lawrence's hit comedy show. (Damn Gina!) Anytime a dynasty separates, it is usually a sad time for their followers. In a previous post, I titled "The Dynamics Of Team Work," I discussed a few characteristics that a well-oiled team usually embodies at the core of their operation. In the remainder of this post, I want to touch on the situation that can occur when your team environment begins to take a decline and your "WE" and it's all about the team perspective, does a 180 flip and your new slogan becomes "It's all about ME!"

As I have lived and been a part of a few teams in my day, I have found myself in similar team circumstances as some of the previously mentioned teams have fallen victim to. What can happen is usually at some point, everybody becomes important. The dreaded ego makes an appearance. So discussions of too little workload or carrying too much of the workload begin to appear at every meeting. You know how it goes, somebody either has the team on their shoulders, or an individual feels like they aren't receiving their recognition because the team is holding them back. Could that be true? In cases like Beyonce, Justin Timberlake, and Michael Jackson absolutely! In other cases, people find out why they were just a team member and not the leader when they go solo. The R&B group New Edition is an exception to that rule. No matter how they cut the pie, that is the members of that group, they always created hit songs. There is always an exception to every rule as they have shown us. As solo projects enter the group, talk about the team becomes an afterthought and trying to coordinate everybody to meet becomes a task.

When you are the nucleus of a situation like I have been, it becomes a challenge of when to cut the team cord. As the nucleus, you are more connected to the team as compared to your counterparts as you have relationships with all the team members individually. Just as the others are basking in the current success of the team, the nucleus recognizes it also but also understands that the team is what got them all to the place where they currently reside. So the question becomes after you have exhausted all of your efforts, when do you cut the cord providing life support for your team? It's tough because you don't know if you will ever play on that team again. You reflect on all the time and energy it took to get to that point and look at the current energy that you feel within the team. Then there is a moment of clarity where you snap out of the trance and realize you have to cut the cord because you are prohibiting your team members from fulfilling their destinies, as well as placing a ceiling on yourself. You accept that you are the only member still talking about what "WE" can accomplish. It's at that moment when the decision to pull the cord has been confirmed and this is the point when the team dissolves and usually never rises again. It's the moment When We Becomes Me!

To Be Continued...... Up Next: Success Separates

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